Faith Transition Therapy
Are You Currently Experiencing A Shift In Your Religious Beliefs?
Has this started to create a lot of stress or anxiety in your life, and your relationships with others?
Have you experienced trauma, abuse or pain due to clergy misusing their spiritual authority to control, manipulate or harm you?
Do you and your partner have more arguments and tension since one of you longer shares the same faith beliefs?
Choosing to exit the religion you grew up in can be scary and painful. You may be experiencing tremendous amounts of grief, anger and betrayal toward your former church community, friends and/or loved ones.
Shifts In LDS/Mormon Or Other Spiritual Faiths Can Be Isolating
When you start questioning core spiritual beliefs that you grew up with, it can feel like your whole world is falling apart. You may notice that you start to question so many parts of your identity and purpose. Sometimes you can feel paralyzed by what is the “right” thing to do, and what you even value or believe anymore.
You may also start to experience rejection from loved ones, your partner, or even friends as they feel confused, resentful and scared of your new beliefs. The fighting is increasing as you struggle to find common ground or even broach topics of faith and spirituality. You never thought you’d suddenly be thrown into a mixed-faith marriage. All you want is to feel connected again, while each person’s beliefs and values are respected and heard. With the help of interfaith couples counseling, you can find a way back to each other.
Do You Have Questions About Faith Transition Therapy?
The Impact Of Religious Trauma
In some religions there are teachings that strongly encourage, or force, individuals to comply with certain rules and ways of living. There can also be consequences or punishments for not living that way, such as being cast out of the community or not being together in heaven. This can leave you with symptoms of anxiety, PTSD, depression, self-doubt, emotional numbness, relationship distress, identity confusion and distrust with religions in general. Healing from religious trauma requires a deep understanding of this pain without minimizing it and believing your experience. Mormon or LDS Faith Transition therapists understand this pain you are experiencing.
Interfaith Marriages
When religious couples get married, often part of the connection is a shared belief and understanding of their religion. It can be incredibly painful and confusing if over the course of the marriage, one partner no longer shares that same belief. You may notice that you and your spouse no longer know how to talk to each other about value differences. It can feel threatening if your partner now wants to explore behaviors such as drinking alcohol or skipping church to go ski or hike. You worry that these differences will tear your family apart, and you feel angry and betrayed that they no longer share these values.
Faith Transition Therapy Can Help You Find a Renewed Sense of Peace
Our specialized counselors will help you navigate identity changes using techniques such as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to help you determine new values in your life, along with values that are similar or ones you want to let go of. You may want to explore a new belief system or spirituality that may or may not involve religion. We know that your path is individual, and that navigating a faith transition is full of emotions and questions that you may not have experienced before.
We also know that grieving is an important part of the process and we will not rush you through this. It is normal to grieve how changing beliefs impact current relationships, along with the social community that you developed in your religion. It is not uncommon to experience guilt, shame, anger or fear as you go through the process and we will be there every step of the way, creating a space of safety as you navigate the very real and painful journey. Our counselors will not minimize your feelings, nor will we keep you stuck in them.
If you experienced spiritual or religious abuse, such as a leader or community misusing their authority to control or manipulate you or threats of damnation or hell, you may be suffering from Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or other trauma symptoms. You may notice you feel numbed out frequently, have nightmares or panic attacks. We have several skilled counselors trained in trauma treatments that can offer quick relief from these symptoms.
Mixed Faith Marriages
Although we don’t have an exact number on how many LDS/Mormon couples are currently in a mixed-faith marriage, an article in 2013 suggested that within religious communities the LDS community has the lowest rate of interfaith marriages [1]. Some online communities report that staying in a mixed faith marriage continues to be a challenge for many LDS couples. This may have to do with the religions belief about eternal marriage and temple ordinances that a non-believing spouse may not be able to participate in. It may also be due to some lifestyle differences once a person no longer believes the rules around alcohol, coffee or Sunday worship. While some marriages may not survive, our counseling for mixed-faith couples focuses on the connections that bring you together and how to allow space for differing values. We believe marriages can still find happiness and peace, even if each partner has different values regarding spirituality and religious practices.
You may need help exploring new ways of feeling close with one another, and how to validate the many emotions your partner is feeling. It may require you to move through resentments you may feel about your partner leaving, or perhaps your resentment about your partner staying. It is a painful experience to get married with the understanding that you both hold the same religious beliefs only to see that crumble. It takes skill and support from a trained therapist that knows the nuances and struggle of a faith transition during marriage. Perhaps you need some skills and education on how to parent your children, given that each parent now has different ideas on Sunday worship, as well as spiritual beliefs. Family Counseling can help everyone to grow in acceptance of each other, as well as increase harmony in the home.
You May Still Have Questions about Faith Transition Therapy
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Mixed Faith Marriage Counseling is not about who is right or who is wrong. The focus is on helping you both to find common ground. While it is not uncommon each person in the partnership may at times feel uncomfortable or challenged, our specialized therapists focus is not to force changes in beliefs, rather to help each person in the relationship find shared values and connection.
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Unfortunately some clients have previously had therapists that have given spiritual or religious responses to their questions around religion. Our faith transition therapists know that you can get those responses from clergy, but in the therapy office you are looking for understanding and therapeutic skills to help you figure out your own beliefs! We will not insert pat religious responses as that is not our role. We believe that inside of you is an ability to figure out what is right for you, and we will support whatever direction that is. This is your time to express whatever emotion, experience or belief that you need to. Our counselors are not afraid to hear it, we won’t judge it, and we will give you the space and skills needed to work through it!
You Can Come To A Place of Peace!
Undergoing a massive change in your religious beliefs can leave you feeling stuck, resentful, angry and scared. It is hard to know what interfaith therapist you can trust to explore all of your feelings and questions, especially if you have had negative experiences in the past. We are happy to offer a consultation to see if our team is a good fit for you. Feel free to contact us using the button on our page or call us at (801) 382-8676. We try to respond to all inquiries within 24 hours.
[1] https://religionnews.com/2013/05/07/why-mormons-have-the-lowest-rates-of-interfaith-marriage/
Faith Transition Therapy Lehi, UT
1220 N 500 W Suite 201,
Lehi, UT 84043